Random pick up lines
by rosemalfoy93
Summary: Draco tries to woo Hermione with cheesy pick up lines while she fends him off with witty comebacks.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: - I do not own Harry Potter.**

-"Did you miss me?"

"With every hex, so far."

-"Do you think it was fate that brought us together?"

"No. It was just bad luck."

-"Are your legs tired? You've been running through my mind all day."

"Yeah, I was looking for a brain cell."

-"Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?"

"No, but sure…. Just try to keep walking next time, though."

-"Hey cutie, date me?"

"Sorry, I don't date outside my species."

-"Haven't I seen you someplace before?"

"Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."

-"Guess what I….."

*Cuts him off* "Sorry you must have me confused with somebody who cares."

-"I would go through anything for you."

"Good! Let's start with the door."

-"I know how to please a woman."

"Then please leave me alone."

-"Where have you been all my life?"

"Hiding from you"

-"What would you say if I asked you to date me?"

"Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time."

-"I think I could make you very happy."

"Why? Are you leaving?"

-"Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out!"

"Okay, get out!"

-"Malfoy. Draco Malfoy."

"Lost. Get Lost"

-"Roses are red, violets are blue, you are cute, and I love you."

"Chilies are red, bats are black, go to hell, and never come back"

-"I know you want me!"

"Yes, I want you to leave me!"

-"If I said you look like an angel, would you treat me like the devil tonight?"

"If by that you mean cursing you to be tortured for all eternity, consider it done!"

-"Hey baby, what's your sign?"

"Do not enter"

-"Excuse me; I think I dropped something... MY JAW!"

"I think you lost something too... your mind."

-"If I saw you naked, I would die happy"

"Yeah, but if I saw you naked I would probably die laughing"

-"I would go to the end of the world for you."

"But the question is, Malfoy, would you stay there?"

-"Apart from being hot, what else do you do?"

"Ignore you."

-"Did you know that you are extremely hot?"

"Well, thank you but you are not!"

-"Hey, it's a Hogsmeade weekend, you know what that means!"

"A show of public display of affection between you and Goyle?"

**AN: - Review/comment and tell me how it was. I couldn't sleep so decided to write a one-shot. Hope it made you laugh. **


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: - I do not own Harry Potter.**

**I would like to thank the following readers for their reviews:-**

**Lovin'EveryMoment, Blue-Eyed-Phoenix77, subarashii o5, queenofslayers, FlubberyFlobberworms, Aashiqui, Chlerek, Artemis Sagittarius Malfoy, Imagen99, Jaiime95, Tsurishi Arashi and Mimpy.**

**Thanks guys, it meant a lot to me. **

D-"You've got a smile that could light up a whole town, Hermione."

H-"You've got a mouth that could accommodate a whole town, Malfoy."

D-"What's it like being the most delightful person here?"

H-"It's something that you'll never know."

D-"What's the best way to get into your affections?"

H-"Via the North Pole, if not further!"

D-" Hello…."

H-"Goodbye."

D-"Look, I won't beat about your bush; I just want to get something fairly big between us."(Wiggles his eyebrows.)

H-"How about the Pacific Ocean?"

D-"Can I spend the evening with you?"

H-"I gave up baby-sitting years ago."

D-"May I have the pleasure of your company?"

H-"No, I want some pleasure too."

D-"Would you like to join me?"

H-"Why are you falling apart?"

D-"Hi there. I'd like to ask you what your idea of a perfect evening is."

H-"The one I was having before you came over."

D-"You really set me on fire, Hermione."

H-"Oh good. I thought I didn't use enough petrol, Draco."

D-"What do you think of the scenery here?"

H-"Better than the company."

D-"Hello, I am a thief and I am here to steal your heart."

H-"Hello, I'm the person smart enough to install a burglar alarm.""

D-"You bring me out in a hot sweat."

H-"You bring me out in an allergic rash."

D-"Is it HOT in here or is it just you?"

H-"Neither. But it will be because if you don't leave immediately, I will set your hair on fire."

D-"I tried to compare you to other witches. But…there's no comparison."

H-"I know the feeling. I once tried to compare you to a normal wizard."

D-"My tea leaves said we'd meet today."

H-"That's why I drink coffee."

D-"Don't frown! You never know who might be falling in love with your smile."

H-"That's actually kind of sweet."

D-"I know." (Smirks)

H-"Don't smirk! You never know who might slap it off your face."

D-"Your common room or mine?"

H-"Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine"

H-"Did I look like a punching bag?"

D-"No"

H-"Then why were you hitting on me?" (smiles and leaves a perplexed-looking Draco behind.)

H-"You know I am invisible."

D-"No you are not."

H-"So you can see me?"

D-"Yes."

H-"Okay then, I will see you tomorrow at Hogsmeade."(Winks and leaves a blissful-looking Draco behind.)

A.N.:- Review/comment and tell me what you thought of this fic.


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